Self-esteem. It's a tricky thing.
One day we're accomplished, successful, loved, and beautiful. But one thing snaps and all the sudden you feel like the world's biggest failure. It may be small. It may be big. But that one thing has the power to control your mind and make you believe that somehow you aren't deserving of love, of hope, of things good for your future.
It's so easy to feel like a failure. If it's not in every aspect of our lives, it's still easy to focus and dwell on the things we loathe about ourselves. Whether they're internal matters or physical matters, it's difficult to keep those distractions at bay and feel in our hearts like we're worth something.
No, I'm not suggesting we focus solely on our positive aspects, putting on the rose-colored glasses and ignoring the faults we need to work on to change. But I believe our society is looking for approval and acceptance in all the wrong places, and when we realize the greatest love that's already upon us, it can change our perception of life.
As a recent college graduate, I find myself wandering through these post-grad months with a foggy sense of direction of where my life is going. And because of that lack of direction, I also have a lack of self-esteem. Who am I really? Is who I've become who I'm supposed to be? What do I really want to do with my life?
I thought I had it all figured out. But truth be told, I've realized that perhaps my plan for my life isn't what God had planned for me at all. And the lack of work, the lack of purpose, has got me all flustered.
There have been many moments where I've felt like a failure. I wonder what in the world am I doing. And as I've sauntered down the road without a clue where it's headed, I begin, piece by piece, to lose my self-esteem. Not getting jobs, interviews, or even an email of recognition that someone has received my resume - it's worn me down into this person that I look in the mirror and all I see is failure.
So as I sat on the couch this afternoon, watching yet another episode of FRIENDS to cheer me up, I began to wonder ... what really can boost my spirits? Because although FRIENDS has always proved to be a great source of laughter for me, it only lasts for 22 minutes.
I began to realize that I needed to really look at myself the way God does. He loves me. And he doesn't just love me when I'm successful. He doesn't just love me when I rocked an exam, or served him at VBS.
He loves the complete, whole, every single bit of me. He loves my loud laugh, he loves my blue eyes and my tiny feet. He loves the way I twirl around the house, because I'm a dancer through-and-through, and simply cannot go a day without twirling, leaping, and throwing in an arabesque wherever I can. He loves me.
And so I took some time today to write a list of the things I think God loves about me. I found writing that list was incredibly freeing, incredibly uplifting, and incredibly full of love itself. I found that the more things I wrote down, the more I thought about how much God loves me. Which made me realize just how much I love him. He loves the parts of me that I loathe, like my unruly hair and the zits that pop up on my face. He loves my crazy irrational fear of spiders and getting bit by a shark.
What I realized most was that simply, yet so unimaginably, he just loves me. He loves all of me. He loves me because he created me.
And writing that list down of those things.... it helped. It helped me see the bigger picture. It helped me widen my view from just focusing on my flaws and failures to the things greater than those - his decision to love me anyway. His decision to love me and help me overcome those things.
That encouragement from that list was life-altering, and I encourage you to do the same.
Write down the things you love about yourself. Then write down the things you think God loves about you. See what you find. You may just find a God who's loved you since forever, who just wants you to see that love reflected in your eyes, too.
Try to see what God sees. It'll open your eyes to a love unlike any other. A love that's willing to accept and welcome you for all you are and all you aren't, give you grace for your flaws and failures, and challenge you to take those flaws and failures to spin them into something beautiful.
One day we're accomplished, successful, loved, and beautiful. But one thing snaps and all the sudden you feel like the world's biggest failure. It may be small. It may be big. But that one thing has the power to control your mind and make you believe that somehow you aren't deserving of love, of hope, of things good for your future.
It's so easy to feel like a failure. If it's not in every aspect of our lives, it's still easy to focus and dwell on the things we loathe about ourselves. Whether they're internal matters or physical matters, it's difficult to keep those distractions at bay and feel in our hearts like we're worth something.
No, I'm not suggesting we focus solely on our positive aspects, putting on the rose-colored glasses and ignoring the faults we need to work on to change. But I believe our society is looking for approval and acceptance in all the wrong places, and when we realize the greatest love that's already upon us, it can change our perception of life.
As a recent college graduate, I find myself wandering through these post-grad months with a foggy sense of direction of where my life is going. And because of that lack of direction, I also have a lack of self-esteem. Who am I really? Is who I've become who I'm supposed to be? What do I really want to do with my life?
I thought I had it all figured out. But truth be told, I've realized that perhaps my plan for my life isn't what God had planned for me at all. And the lack of work, the lack of purpose, has got me all flustered.
There have been many moments where I've felt like a failure. I wonder what in the world am I doing. And as I've sauntered down the road without a clue where it's headed, I begin, piece by piece, to lose my self-esteem. Not getting jobs, interviews, or even an email of recognition that someone has received my resume - it's worn me down into this person that I look in the mirror and all I see is failure.
So as I sat on the couch this afternoon, watching yet another episode of FRIENDS to cheer me up, I began to wonder ... what really can boost my spirits? Because although FRIENDS has always proved to be a great source of laughter for me, it only lasts for 22 minutes.
I began to realize that I needed to really look at myself the way God does. He loves me. And he doesn't just love me when I'm successful. He doesn't just love me when I rocked an exam, or served him at VBS.
He loves the complete, whole, every single bit of me. He loves my loud laugh, he loves my blue eyes and my tiny feet. He loves the way I twirl around the house, because I'm a dancer through-and-through, and simply cannot go a day without twirling, leaping, and throwing in an arabesque wherever I can. He loves me.
And so I took some time today to write a list of the things I think God loves about me. I found writing that list was incredibly freeing, incredibly uplifting, and incredibly full of love itself. I found that the more things I wrote down, the more I thought about how much God loves me. Which made me realize just how much I love him. He loves the parts of me that I loathe, like my unruly hair and the zits that pop up on my face. He loves my crazy irrational fear of spiders and getting bit by a shark.
What I realized most was that simply, yet so unimaginably, he just loves me. He loves all of me. He loves me because he created me.
And writing that list down of those things.... it helped. It helped me see the bigger picture. It helped me widen my view from just focusing on my flaws and failures to the things greater than those - his decision to love me anyway. His decision to love me and help me overcome those things.
That encouragement from that list was life-altering, and I encourage you to do the same.
Write down the things you love about yourself. Then write down the things you think God loves about you. See what you find. You may just find a God who's loved you since forever, who just wants you to see that love reflected in your eyes, too.
Try to see what God sees. It'll open your eyes to a love unlike any other. A love that's willing to accept and welcome you for all you are and all you aren't, give you grace for your flaws and failures, and challenge you to take those flaws and failures to spin them into something beautiful.
